760 of 1000 Cranes folded....

Within the Silence

Over the past month, I have managed to fold a number of cranes.  I have reached about 650-700.  Pictures soon to come...

Memories that are just memories...

As I have changed my life, I have had the opportunity to revisit the places I have been.  In that self reflection that can overtake me when I am tired and in doubt, I wander the closet of my past, touching the memories.  I know something profound has changed me.  My heartstrings make no sound in the company of these memories.

Those love songs that would stop me in my tracks have become music again.  No longer a key to unlock the flood gates of what happened and what I had thought it had all meant.

And the moment, the right here and now, has a richer, more dynamic sensation and experience for me.  I can see what I have and hear myself speak kindly and in gratitude.

Finding My Ray of Light

The inward journey to discover the inspiration, that ray of light that illuminates the world we are living in, giving it new perspective and meaning.

What are the things that make you smile to yourself? Laugh? Today, I am just going to be grateful for the steps that I take and the little rays of light that show up along the way.

Gratitude in Loss

The past 3-4 years life has provided me with lots of opportunity to experience loss,  Loss of relationship, loss of work, loss of home.  and recently, it has been a loss of transportation, my car has reached the point of no return, where the cost to fix outweighs its worth financial and what it contributes to my life.

held on for dear life
Committed to holding on til the end
Despite any real comfort
And the slow breakdown of the systems

A gift accepted, but not what I would want
Afraid of how would I fill that space

such an inelegant expression
of being alive

to have the spaces in life occupied by our fears
by what could or should be

so when I let go,
weightlessness lent a new perspective
a new choice
neither contemplated or conceived

New Way of Loving

I am learning a new way of loving, where it is not about what I do. Loving as an addition to the already existing miracle of life.   As an amplifier of what we hope and how we see ourselves.
To love to the very edges of my soul and let another choose what resonates, what is the gift accepted.

The door is still closed.  I cannot know what resides in the depths of your heart and soul.  I can only partake of the meal that is set before me.  There is subtlety that is not lost on this poet.  So I accept the generous gift of the moment, as honored guest. And I leave my small gift of thanks on the doorstep...

Little Notes Along the Way

My words are little notes along the way
A way of marking the moment
Looking at life for the happiness

I had long forgotten my own gift
what words can conjure and create

Words that illuminate what already exists
For my words have merit
the markers for the horizon set before me.

Words that fall into another context
Another horizon and have relevance

Words that acknowledge we are so much more than our corporeal existence
It is that expansiveness which has me choose to be in the moment

A Bit of Self Compassion

I am the first to say that, I am my greatest critic and that anything that has been said about me in the world, I have said worse to myself.  I can be difficult to give ourselves room to breath and be kind to ourselves when we make a mistake or come up short in what is expected.

In the quiet morning hours before the world arises
I sink in and draw into my heart
A little prayer of hope and unconditional love
Gifted first to another and then myself
On the fringes of my being
I might begin to understand compassion

I am expansive in my gifting to another
And miserly to myself..
So I am not able to love so greatly
What I have to give becomes empty
In the treatment that I give myself.

In that next moment and breath
I face myself again
And let light shine into those dark places
I find the gift again
Bestowing a greater kindness than I have ever imagined
I begin to feel a bit of my own compassion
In the quiet morning before the world arises.

A Day to Rest & Reflect

After a long morning wrapped in comfort, I had to return to the calling of responsibility and motherhood.  The day to rest seems to have evaporated in the joyous laughter of child and play...

Letting go of what I might have done to spend the day with my daughter..

Many Forms of Inspiration

What is there to be grateful for today?  Does it have to anything more than a sunny day or that I woke up and found something to be excited about and inspiring?

Inspiration 
That moves us from our comfortable place
Tickles our imagination 
To consider ourselves or the world
In a luminescent brightness 
To have more of our humanity be expressed 


Inspiration as a cascade of cards
when one being touches another
who touches another
who touches another


Inspiration as unabashed naive sharing
And there is the glimpse and gift of the treasure trove
      of our experience


When art meets us 
And divulges the sweetness of a forgotten moment
Or a forgotten dream
Where imagination is possibility expressed
It is everything we ever wanted to be when we were 5 years old
And knew was only a matter of doing it


Whatever we call inspiration 
There is movement and grace to it
Each time it passes it to view
I am grateful to be the recipient of someone else's inspiration.

An Introduction: Starting in the Middle

This journey I am on was not apparent when I started. I was at the end of one phase of my life and reevaluating who I was and who I might be. After 3 months of writing and learning to love myself in a completely new way, I see the path that I am on.

I have finally surrendered to the writing everyday. I had not realized how important or empowering it was to my life. No matter what, I generate meaning, so why not generate meaning that has me feel inspired and alive in my life.

I awoke in the hangover of a dream

And in the next moment

there was a gentle stoke of kindness

along a corporeal curve

reminding me of another reality

separate and apart from the perceived indecision

apart from my fear

apart from the past

It is in the movement and the breath

that I discover the loving, aching of who I am.